In early 2013, I was asked if I’d be interested in writing a column on lingerie from a man’s perspective. Apparently, they didn’t know who they were talking to! After accepting the assignment for one column, it quickly turned into a three part editorial titled, Lingerie: A Way of Life. After talking with women who had read the columns, I realized something. A lot of men aren’t familiar with traditional dating etiquette and chivalry, and the women are none the wiser. Due to the great response to my lingerie editorials, I decided to start The Chivalrous Life; offering a unique and refreshing perspective on romance, chivalry and lingerie through the eyes of a man.
Raised in a traditional Italian American family, my mother taught her boys to respect and adore women. However, having begun my adulthood in the mid 90’s, it was very easy to succumb to the fast paced, meet for a drink a few times routine and bam! Before you know it, you’re living together, struggling to pay bills and maybe even raising children and getting married. Too much, too soon…too young.
By the time I entered my thirties, I had one failed marriage and another close call under my belt. It was time to take inventory of the patterns I had established, the mistakes I had made and focus on my own personal growth and happiness. We’ve all heard the definition of insanity described as doing the same thing over and over expecting different results, right?
My previous significant relationships had progressed to moving in together within a matter of two to three months and one, married within nine months. In an effort to find what I truly wanted, I decided to try something completely different than I had done in the past. When I found someone I was interested in, I would go “old school” and court her. Ask her out and upon her acceptance, propose a time to pick her up and promptly get busy planning the evening! Granted the first date was a success, we’d take everything slow and truly get to know each other. After meeting the woman who would later become my wife, that is exactly what I did, and did again…over and over for more than three years. To corroborate my earlier claim that women are none the wiser, the very first time I picked my wife up, she was pleasantly surprised to hear that I had our evening together planned and commented, “Wow, I’m impressed!”. That night provided a refreshing, wonderful, sweet, innocent, alcohol and expectation free evening of getting further acquainted with one another. The quintessential first date that like many of our subsequent dates, would end with me walking her to her door and heading home to my own place. The result? Nearly four years of beautiful, exciting courtship culminating in a wonderful Kauai destination wedding. Doing things this way would result in my best, strongest, longest and truest relationship yet, and the courtship continues in our marriage.
The Chivalrous Life is the place to find creative date ideas for every budget, restaurant reviews and articles, as well as reviews on lingerie with the occasional clothing and accessory review sprinkled in. The Chivalrous Life has a strong emphasis on the importance of a man to know his lady’s clothing, shoe and lingerie sizes, and for men and women both to embrace the concept of random acts of romance, making every day a special occasion…just because.